Fellas, You ARE Ready

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Today’s blog is primarily for the guys.

I mean, it could also be for the ladies as well. However, this is a message to the men out there trying to figure out if they are ready for marriage. To further clarify, not so much as it pertains to being committed, but rather, just ready to take the plunge because you have truly found your soul mate.

Allow me to share with you how I came to this point of understanding and how it opened my eyes.

If you are like most people, this pandemic and stay at home ordinance has propelled millions of people worldwide to streaming services. My streaming service of choice was Netflix. The variety of programming options are great, and the quality of content is excellent.

Most recently, I wrapped up three seasons of Designated Survivor, starring Kiefer Sutherland. Have any of you seen the series—whether when it aired on ABC or recently on Netflix? If not, let me give you a brief overview of the show.

Kiefer Sutherland plays Thomas Kirkman, US Secretary of Housing and Development, is named the designated survivor for the State of the Union address. After a massive attack on the White House that killed the president and other top officials, Kirkman suddenly ascends as the Commander in Chief after everyone ahead of him in the presidential line of succession dies. Kirkman deals with his inexperience as the new president while looking to uncover the truth behind the attack.

Everyone in his family, overnight, becomes the First Family. 24/7 security. No one saw this coming, and there was no formal preparation for it. The newly installed president is now making decisions on behalf of millions of people and managing international affairs with no clear answer. Throughout the series, President Kirkman makes decisions where he is not confident, unsure, and on many occasions, doubted himself. Although he was blessed with a strong and supportive wife, instantly becoming the Leader of the Free World is no small feat. Again, no one could have possibly been ready for this. However, following his moral compass and convictions, resisting the allure to making policy to please his supporters and instead, making touch choices that he felt was in the best interest of the United States.

Men—many of you may be courting a special lady. She is the woman of your dreams. You want to marry her, but you feel as though you need a better job, more money, and other “things in order” that seem to preclude the outrageous notion that you could have the audacity to ask her to spend the rest of her life with you. For some, it could be that her father did such a fantastic job raising her that you need to replicate what he was able to do before even considering approaching the topic with her.

Are any of you out there reading this a parent? I will go out on a limb and say that no child has ever been brought into the world with a “How to Raise Me” manual. Moreover, if there is one thing that I have learned about life, you will plan for any and every scenario—and invariably, something happens that catches you off guard. You are not ready for it, yet you must respond to it.

Gentlemen, hear me when I say this: if there is a woman in your life that you are madly in love with, and you cannot imagine your life without her, commit to her via marriage or exclusive commitment NOW. Do not wait until you have more money in the bank or until your FICO is over 800 points. Do not wait until you have more money in the bank or hung out a bit more with the homies. Or until you can afford a home. If you are in the process of building your life, 9 out of 10 women will accept your request for commitment if you are sincere and transparent where you are but want them to be with you.

Now let me put a disclaimer out there—this does NOT refer to men/women who are unhappily married, and they want to get with their side piece. Or you are going through a divorce, and the ink is not yet dry on the divorce papers. However, this blog is speaking to the men (and women) who feel there is a level of perfection that is required before you can build a life together. Yes—I am talking about making the plane while it is flying.

Remember the show I mentioned earlier in this blog, “Designated Survivor?” Well, here is a spoiler alert: despite having no experience as a politician, let alone a president, he was re-elected and served a second term. If you have air in your lungs, you have everything you need to take on anything in life. ANYTHING

Kerry

Picture Courtesy of Peach Essence Weddings

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