Come on—You Already Know the Answer

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“YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!”

Remember that critically acclaimed movie starring Tom Cruise and Jack Nicholson entitled, “A Few Good Men?” It’s a story of two US Marines, and they were court-martialed and charged with the murder of a fellow Marine. Tom Cruise played the role of LT Daniel Kaffee, a Navy lawyer. The iconic scene between him and Nicholson, who played the role of a lieutenant colonel, prods Nicholson to give him the information he needs to resolve the case. Cruise yells, “Tell me the truth!” and before Cruise can complete his demand for an answer, Nicholson yells back at him, “You can’t handle the truth!”

Ah—what great cinematic memories.

But I wonder, in a very similar way are you tied up in a relationship with someone and need to hear the truth about your love reality—or is it that you really can’t handle the truth? Or is it that deep down, that you know the truth, but you are in the space of     self-deception and pretend that you don’t know what’s going on—and you do understand?

Professional relationship therapists will collectively make millions of dollars seeing clients and tell them what they already know. Most, if not all therapists, will tell you the vast majority of their clients already know what they need to do to resolve their situation, but instead of acting on what they see, they would rather pay a therapist to tell them what they already know.

You know that woman does not love you—or remains consumed with her previous breakup. He calls you only when he wants something and can barely remember your last name. You keep hanging in there, but you already know it’s futile.

Need a little help? Glad you asked—here you go!

  • Accept that you are worthy of better. Stop what you are doing and look in the mirror.
  • Look at your relationship. Seriously, look at it with honest eyes and reflect on the comments those closest to you have been saying.
  • Accept that you cannot make your partner change.
  • Please stop trying to make it all better (all on your own).
  • Moving on means actually moving on.

As MC Breed used to say, “Ain’t no future in your frontin’…”

Kerry

Picture Courtesy of I-Stock

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